It had to
happen. I have never flatted during a
race, never had to pull over and yak, never had a race-ending cramp, never had
any serious GI issues to speak of. I
have been very, very fortunate. But my luck ran out on June 8th, at my hometown race. Had a pretty good day going too. Here’s how it all went down…
Pre-Race
This was the
best. Got to town a few days early to
enjoy some time with my parents and my dog.
Ate very well, rested up, got some homework done, and had a series of
lovely evenings on the patio. Sooo good.
Race Day!
I’m going to try out a new format for this race report. This is the chronology of my thoughts as I
made my way around Boise via tri. Each
entry begins with total time elapsed.
Enjoy!
Swim
0:00:00 –
There’s the gun! Oh boy oh boy oh boy!
0:00:05 – No
idea what’s going on right now. This
always feels like being in a washing machine.
0:01:30 –
We’re swimming suuuper fast. This hurts
already.
0:04:00 –
Things are stretching out now, and those feet seem to be moving about as fast
as mine, let’s
go with it.
0:07:22 – Dammit! The feet are just out of reach.
0:07:27 –
Dammit! The feet are pulling away.
0:07:45 –
Dammit! I’m swimming alone. Again.
Like always. So boring. So sad.
0:10:18 –
Did something just hit my leg?
0:10:22 –
There are people behind me! Hell yeah!
0:10:28 –
This must be the “third pack”, I haven’t been dropped after all, sooo good!
0:11:00 –
This is suuuuper comfy, I’ll take it.
0:21:45 –
This is too comfy, I’m going for it.
0:24:56 – I never
should have gone for it.
0:26:34 –
Where the hell is the exit?
0:28:45 – Is
that my swim time!? Yahtzee!
 |
| Cool photo of the swim exit, courtesy of the Statesman |
T1
0:29:45 –
Only two minutes down on the main chase group?
Not bad, not bad.
Bike
0:35:13 – Holy
cow! Matt Russell can ride a bike.
0:40:39 –
Heart rate is high 150s, but this feels so easy!
0:40:41 –
Listen to Chris and back it off. Here,
have a gel and some sports drink.
0:51:24 – HR
where it needs to be now, good deal.
Let’s settle in for 60’.
0:55:27 –
Gonna be a windy afternoon. Good thing
I’ve ridden these roads all my life and know what’s up.
0:56:13 –
I’ve always hated these roads.
1:20:41 –
God it’s boring out here. And this wind
is the fricking worst. Especially for
skinny little nancy boys. Here, have
another gel and some some sports drink.
1:24:01 –
Just champed up that hill, solid work.
Too bad there isn’t more climbing for skinny little nancy boys.
1:34:09 –
Bevan’s going fast, hot damn. Let’s
count to see where I’m at.
1:35:16 –
There goes Kevin Everett.
1:37:56 –
There goes Chris Bagg.
1:39:31 –
There’s the turn-around, riding in 21st, I can live with that. Top-20 should be doable.
1:42:45 – Am
I still riding into the wind? Did it
change directions!? WTF!?
2:01:53 – Here,
have another gel and some sports drink.
2:21:45 –
It’s Amy and Elena, hell yeah!
2:36:35 –
Did I just yell “Daddy”? Just because
you’re a little nancy boy doesn’t mean you need to act like one.
2:43:43 –
I’ve had enough. No more wind. No more pedaling. No more anything. Here, have another gel and some sports drink.
2:53:48 – I
think I’m going to have to pee all over the stallion.
2:54:22 –
The stallion is never going to forgive me.
2:55:13 –
Off the bike, thank God. 2:24:05 on the
ride, that plays. Especially for a
nance.
T2
2:55:43 –
That announcer is a dick.
Run
2:56:13 – HR
is supposed to be 145 for first two miles!?
Really?? Was that a joke??? I might as well walk.
2:56:15 –
Listen to Chris and back it off.
3:08:00 –
150 HR for first two miles, there’s no way I was going that fast. But I’ll take it!
3:14:30 –
Three miles in and this feels AWESOME!
May have finally eaten enough on the bike to actually run well! Here, have another gel and some sports drink.
3:25:49 – Hi
Mom!
 |
| When I was running well, and smiling; the Boise Greenbelt is a thing of beauty |
3:39:42 – 7
miles down, 6 to go. Energy is good,
legs are good, let’s send this thing home!
Here, have another gel.
3:41:45 – I
shouldn’t have eaten that gel.
3:42:42 – I
really shouldn’t have eaten that gel.
3:43:51 –
Gurgle.
3:43:51.5 –
I think my stomach just gurgled.
3:44:22 – I
think my stomach just growled.
3:44:32 – I
think my stomach just turned inside-out.
3:45:12 – I think
my stomach was just ripped out of my peritoneal cavity and I’m now being
slapped in the face with it.
3:45:31 – I
think my stomach just declared war on my intestines.
3:46:41 – I
think my stomach and my intestines just signed a truce and are now teaming up
on my colon.
3:46:50 – My
colon isn’t going to be able to hold them off.
3:46:51 – I
desperately need a port-a-potty.
3:48:07 – If
I’m not in a port-a-potty in the next minute I’m going to make my own right
here in my tri shorts.
3:49:33 –
Thank God!
-------Details
omitted, because nobody needs to read about that--------
3:57:13 –
Well, that’s a bummer.
3:57:16 –
Ha! Get it!?
3:58:00 –
Might as well walk it in. No sense not
finishing. I mean, you’re not dead.
3:58:05 –
Although I do feel kinda dead.
4:00:00 – Am
I really going to walk it in?
4:03:15 –
Let’s try a little light jogging…
4:03:18 –
Nope, nope, nope. That ain’t gonna work.
4:15:24 –
Maybe things are sorted out now. Let’s
try a few light strides…
4:15:35 –
Ain’t nobody got time for that!
4:27:56 –
Elena’s going to walk with me, that’s a good deal. She’s the best.
5:08:04 –
Finally the line. Was on pace for ~1:22
run, finished with a ~2:11. Rats.
5:08:05 –
Who’s got a beer?
 |
| Winner Bevan Docherty crossing the line (photo by the Idaho Statesman) |
 |
| Loser Andrew Langfield crossing the line much, much later; Despite my facial expression, I didn't feel too bad at this point |
And so it
happened that I walked it in, but I’m happy I finished. Racing back home is always fun, because I
know the course so well, and know so many people in the crowd, and can really
feel the support of the community. Plus,
I did earn 10 whole points toward 70.3 Worlds.
So I got that going for me…
And contrary
to what my stomach would tell you, it was still a good day, with lots of things
to take away. There always are. Mainly, I’m still trying to nail the
nutrition piece. I got pretty close this
time. I was moving well, with good legs
and good energy. And just when I was
ready to attack the back half of the run, my stomach decided it had had
enough. So some small changes, and
hopefully I’ll get it right next time.
Thank Yous
I had the
best support crew imaginable on this trip.
My parents were unbelievable throughout. Not only were they hugely supportive out on
the race course, but they basically ran a small hostel for the few days leading
up. So thank you so much, mom and dad,
for all that you do in support of this extravagant hobby of mine. I love you both. And Elena, I couldn’t have done this without
you. Thank you so much for making the
trip, for visiting my homeland, for all the encouragement, and for walking the
last five miles with me. You turned a
disappointing situation into a beautiful stroll, and one I won’t ever forget.
Big thanks
to all my Boise friends and the tri community too! This race has sort of become a staple on the
calendar. I love coming home and seeing
you all, and there is nothing better than racing when you can feel the
love. Thanks volunteers, TriTown, the Boise
Y, and everyone in between. There is
something special going on in Idaho, and I’m lucky to be a part of it.
Last but not
least, coach Chris Bagg, thanks for all the help and advice. Feel like I’m getting closer. This was a great race plan, and the nutrition
piece will hopefully fall in line next time.
I continue to learn so much from you.
And it was great fun sharing the weekend with you and Amy.
So finally I’m
caught up on race reports, just in time for my next outing: 70.3 Vineman this
Sunday! Thanks for reading everyone. And things are just getting started here, so
stay tuned!
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